Dawn and I had looked forward to the week of January 28th for some time. We had traveled to Dallas to spend a Monday through Friday vacation to celebrate our grandson Bennett’s first birthday. We had a special party with decorations and presents and above all we had quality time with Sarrah, Brandon and Bennett. It was a great week with special memories being shared each day. Suddenly a Thursday afternoon message on Dawn’s phone changed everything. We were driving on the freeway when Dawn repeated what she had heard on the message. “Richard has been shot.” We looked at her with disbelief and then she repeated the phrase again. We sat in silence as Dawn returned the call to her brother to try and gather the details. Little was known but it was clear that her mother Carol’s husband, Richard, had been shot and he was at the hospital. We went to the apartment and immediately began searching the internet to find flights out of Dallas. Within three hours we were at the airport to fly back to Phoenix before driving to California. Then the next call came in. “Richard had died.” Our thoughts went from a hospital vigil of hope to dealing with this tragedy. Carol was now a widow. Their day had started with preparation for a trip to St. Louis. Richard had gone to see his father before the trip. He called Carol to report being shot. She was able to get to him as the paramedics were in route. She said, “Hold on” and he said, “I don’t think I am going to make it. I love you.” With those words, he lost consciousness. In that moment, Carol’s world would change forever.

We see these events on television or in the newspaper so often we become desensitized to the emotional devastation that is connected to death. For those who have personally lost someone they love, they know the pain and anguish connected to it. Words cannot bring comfort and the quest to find out why only leads to frustration. As a Christian it is important to understand that Jesus did not come to remove all suffering, he came to help us through our suffering. Our faith is not an instant cure to sadness; but an anchor of stability. It is there to keep us from washing away with the fear and anger that rush the soul each and every day. God hates death. Jesus hates death. One day this enemy will be under our feet. Until that day, God has sent us His Spirit to give us comfort. He is here to help us walk out of the dungeon that death tries to hold us captive within. The journey out is different for each person who has suffered loss. There is no appropriate time for grieving or for it “to be over.” Little by little we find a new “normal.” It seems that those who stay connected to loved ones get out of the darkness faster than those who become isolated and live alone.

After a long day of many emotional swings I heard one voice of laughter among the many others. Carol had laughed and no one really noticed. I looked her in the eye and told her how good it felt to hear her laugh. Then everyone held back tears once again. Keep praying for Carol and all of Pastor Dawn’s family. Your love and support have meant so much to us during our time of loss.